The Sweet Ones

It’s that time of year that the greeting card companies, flower shops and chocolate makers love—Valentine’s Day. Most years there’s a romantic comedy or romantic drama that comes out around V-Day—this year there’s not much... would Fifty Shades Darker be considered a love story?

Not too long ago Vanity Fair did an article on the top 25 best love story movies-- http://www.vanityfair.com/culture/2013/09/25-best-love-story-movies-- and when you look at the list you see how wide-ranging it is. But something else you can’t help but notice is that only one of the films was from this century—and it was a small independent that few people saw. Rotten Tomatoes, IMDB and others have similar lists with almost nothing from recent years. Point being, all the great love story movies seem to be very much in the past.

Why is that?

Is it because we’re more cynical? More jaded? More mature? Less trivial? What’s the deal???

I have to wonder, on some level, if movies in the ‘romance’ category are perceived as the film equivalent of a romance novel. Hope that’s not the case, but worry that it is. And it’s an unfair comparison. While the stereotypical romance novel often has cardboard characters, cookie cutter plots and nary a surprise in sight, great romance films aim higher. They aim to uncover something about what it means to love and be loved—or to struggle to find love.

Think about it: this is one of the common human experiences that we all share, the desire to love, the quest for love. If we’re lucky, we feel love at birth from our parents and it becomes a constant in our life. If we’re not lucky and that parental love is weak or isn’t there at all, we search for love in other ways—through friends, teachers… we might even imagine other people are our parents so we can bask in their imaginary love! But from the time you’re born, love, or its absence, is there, and you’re aware of that.

Once we begin to mature we start looking for love outside the home—shoot, preschoolers express love for one another in their hopeful, stilted little ways! The search for love then becomes a constant of our lives, and even once found nurturing that love continues to be something that occupies our lives.

So what’s wrong with telling stories about that search, that experience? Why aren’t there more of them?

I think it’s down to two things: first, they aren’t perceived as ‘important’ compared to other film genres and second, love is tough. And it’s that second one that’s the killer. Love is tough in real life, so writing about it is particularly tough. You have to avoid the trite yet tap into the universal—it’s a fine line.

But of all the films you could write, I think ones that incorporate a love story [whether labeled as a romance film or not] are the most important. If the rise of internet dating tells us anything, it’s that the search for love continues to be a major occupation for this generation, just as much as it was for the last. So there are LOTS of stories to be told. And what’s more vital than telling stories about this major part of everyone’s life?

So this V-Day, think about the universality of this love-thing. And think about the stories you could tell that would tap into this most basic of human emotions.

Copyright © Diane Lake

12Feb17

Email Diane a question to Diane@DianeLake.com