Making Messes

“You can’t make an omelet without breaking some eggs” as the saying goes. And you can’t aim for the stars without [probably] breaking something more precious than eggs.

Anytime you dream big and shoot for something that’s tough—whether it’s writing, acting, painting, composing, etc.—something gets left behind. For example, if you’re a working mom with kids but you want to act, you’ll be rehearsing plays in the evening instead of overseeing your kids’ homework. Or if you’re a flight attendant who wants to sing opera and your hub is Detroit, you’re probably not going to be in an area where you can audition for many operas…so you might have to change jobs to get to a bigger city.

Life is about making choices—choose to go to one college over another and you could be choosing one spouse over another, as many people meet their spouses in college. After graduating from college if you choose to live in the Midwest it will be almost impossible to break into writing for television, as most shows are still filmed in L.A. Want to dance in musicals? Lots of chances for community theatre all over the country, but if you want to make it big you probably will feel you have to give New York a shot.

So the choices you make as an artist of any kind involve making sacrifices. Your entire family live in Kansas but you know being a painter there is almost impossible? Might be tough to take off for L.A. or New York or Paris…you could be really lonely and all you have is, what? A dream?

And worse, there are thousands of people doing the same thing—leaving the comfort of what they know to follow a dream that is but a glimmer, with just the barest sliver of hope, statistically speaking, that the dream could come to fruition.

So why do it? Why dream? Why leave the comfort of what you know for the, perhaps, terror of the unknown?

Well, because you have to. Plus you don’t want to grow old wondering if you could have done it, if you should have tried.

Not everyone is cut out for the life of an artist—there’s so much uncertainty, there’s often little to hold onto except your personal vision, and many who follow that dream don’t succeed.

It would be a mistake to embark on the path of a creative career and not recognize—up front—the potential fallout. But you know what, if you do follow that dream, you’ll really be living your life— your life, not the life someone else would wish for you, however well-meaning their wishes might be—but your life, the life of your dreams. Will you reach that dream? Maybe not. But you’ll be living the life of one who tries…and boy, there’s a lot to be said for that.

But as with making that omelet, things will be broken… as the lyrics say to “Here’s to the Dreamer” in La La Land:

Here’s to the fools who dream

Crazy as they may seem

Here’s to the hearts that break

Here’s to the mess we make.

And make no mistake, messes will be made. You don’t try for something amazing without messing up, and even creating messes for others as well, even though it wasn’t your intention.

I think the mess is inevitable, no matter how careful you are, how thoughtful, how considerate of others—the dream will take over and sacrifices will be made. But don’t be afraid of that, embrace it. In some respects, you have to be able to say with confidence, “Bring on the mess!”

Copyright © Diane Lake

08Jan17

Email Diane a question to Diane@DianeLake.com